The other day I posted this quote from Albert Einstein on our Facebook page “Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.” Who knew Albert Einstein was also so emotionally intelligent? You see, I agree with this quote…we are made to live with and for others! The problem is our society tells us otherwise. Our society tries to convenience us of one of two lies.
The first lie is that we already to have a strong support system. We are so easily “connected” to the world around us that it creates a false sense of community. We can share our joys, accomplishments, hurts and frustrations on Facebook and instantly feel connected to hundreds of other people. The problem is, this isn’t genuine community. Genuine community requires contentedness, sharing all parts of ourselves (the good, the bad, and the ugly), and living life together (being with one another in good times and bad). These are things you can’t get from internet relationships.
The second lie is that we don’t need a support system. The world around us tries to convince us that needing others is a sign of weakness and that we should be strong and independent. In reality, I think cultivating a strong support community requires a lot of strength because truly letting others into your life can be risky…but it is a risk worth taking.
Often in my practice I have clients tell me things like “you’re the only person I can talk to” or “I am basically paying you to be my friend.” While I love what I do and am honored when people invite me to be a part of their journey, I find these statements profoundly sad. It is sad to me that so many people find it difficult to find a strong support system.
Personally, I really began to see the importance of a strong support system after our daughter was born. Before that I think I always took it for granted, but after my daughter was born I began to realize that there is no way my husband and I could raise this child alone! We needed others to pour into her life as well. We needed grandparents to love and spoil her in ways that we cannot. We needed friends who have different gifts than we do to help her see life from a different perspective. We needed aunts and uncles, cousins, pastors, and many, many friends to pour into her sweet little life. And not just to pour into her life but ours too. People to guide us in parenting, to be willing to babysit, to bring us meals during difficult times, and people to just sit with and talk about the joys and trials of everyday life. We needed a community for our daughter and for ourselves.
We have been blessed with a great support system which is part of why it makes me so sad to see others missing out on this crucial component in life. I want others to experience the joy of living life with and for others.
If you find yourself feeling alone and/or struggling to find a support system give us a call. We would love to walk along side you and help you to find your way to a strong community as well!